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22 June 2006 @ 01:21 am
DoctorWho 100: Fic: Prompt 86: Choices  
Title: Choices
Rating: G/K
Word Count: 549
Prompt: 086. Choices
Claim: Ten
Spoilers: None
Link To DoctorWho_100 Prompt Table
It was all a matter of choices. All a matter of yea or nay. God was he tired of having to be the decider. How many peoples has he destroyed now? Oh he has destroyed his own, he knows that. He has destroyed the Daleks once. He wonders though how many he killed inadvertently. He wonders just how many he has murdered. And he wonders at this moment, at an end of sorts (not his though, never his) if he is not the monster's nightmare but the monster.

"Make your choice Doctor." The thing holding Rose says.

Rose, so many choices, so few of them decided. Lover or friend, protected or protector, savior or damnation, he wonders if he will ever get to decide now.

If he had been faced with this situation (a companion or a civilization) when he was young, he would have had a long debate.

"Both of their time is running out."

Long as the time would allow. The debate, the choice for him would be different than now though. The choice then would be which life does he value, and in the end he knows (and he has already decided too many times) he would value the many lives over the few. Now though, now in a younger form, but with a much older view he knows what he values. He values Rose equal if not more than the millions of people who could die for him choosing her. He begins to think. He has already killed so many, he killed those he knew, those he loved, his own people (no matter what his qualms with them they were still his people) now he has no one. He has no one except this human girl so fragile. Doesn't he deserve her, a last bit of peace? Would his conscience really be that much more burdened by a few more millions?

He looks up at Rose. It is the first time he has looked at her since she has been taken hostage. Perhaps not so fragile. There is no fear in her body language, in her eyes it shines there but she is bravely accepting it and trying to overcome it.

The Doctor thinks that Rose expects him to choose her. That is why she is brave. Then Rose smiles (weak but that does not discount it), and she speaks. "My Doctor." Those words, dredged up from an experience she should not remember. He realizes that she expects him to make the right choice.

"I don't want to lose you." It is all he seems to be able to vocalize.

Rose laughs, she laughs, he can't help but think that is the worst thing she could do. "You don't want to loose me? Doctor, you knew you would eventually have to. Do not make a mistake that neither of us could live with." She doesn't say blatantly what he should do. He knows though.

"I am so sorry." He says, and all he can do is hope it doesn't sound as pathetic to other’s ears as it does to his. It takes several moments for the creatures surrounding them to realize he has chosen against his companion. It takes them barely a second more to kill her.

So many choices and never enough of them.

Comment and I will give you a jelly baby.
Mood: melancholymelancholy
Music: Collide-Dishwalla-Dishwalla
midasu: labrinthmidasu on June 22nd, 2006 06:28 am (UTC)
made me cry. (i've never had a jelly baby, ever.)
Nichole: the hugwalkwithheroes on June 22nd, 2006 07:07 am (UTC)
Oh, that's so pretty and yet so sad. :(
canadian_kazz: TARDIS kathiantacanadian_kazz on June 22nd, 2006 08:09 am (UTC)
Aw! So...SAD! *weeps* Well done...
LilacFree: pandalilacfree on June 22nd, 2006 12:00 pm (UTC)
Very good. Nice bite to the end.
who_wolfwho_wolf on June 22nd, 2006 12:02 pm (UTC)
Lovely and so sad too - very well done :)

P.S. - I love jellybabies :D
Millywiccagal_1996 on June 22nd, 2006 05:37 pm (UTC)
Not ashamed to say I have tears....
Very good.
Junior Miss Tough Chick of the Universesuperherogrlcat on June 22nd, 2006 09:13 pm (UTC)